Being Engaged Isn't All It's Cracked Up To Be

I have an unfortunate habit, noted in my last post, of not thinking things through completely, or rather, at all. This was the case this past February when my friend, I shall call him Guyman for sake of privacy, and I decided to pretend to get engaged. How did two teenagers who weren't even dating end up faking an engagement? Ah, patience vast spaces of internet, you will see.

First off blogosphere, it must be noted that everyone thought that Guyman and I should date, or assumed we were dating. Our entire school, our parents, hell, even my dog, were encouraging me to go out with Guyman. Guyman and I took it in stride for the most part. You see, due to the stupidity of Guyman and I, a rumor began that I had done X rated things with Guyman in his hot tub. Which I had not. But Guyman and his girlfriend also broke up around this time. A lesson in high school brain math :

Guyman single+scandalacious rumors involving other girl=Guyman dating other girl!

Eventually, even Facebook told me I should date Guyman. Marriage bot told me Guyman was my best choice to marry in the future. Exasperated, I joked to Guyman that maybe we should change our relationship statuses to "Engaged". Then, somehow our brains leaped simultaneously to:

WE SHOULD FAKE IT AT SCHOOL TOO

Do you remember how my brain leaves important variables out of common sense equations? Usually this equation would go:

Lying about engagement+Faking relationship with Guyman=Awkwardness all around after the truth is revealed

But in my mind, this equation went:

Lying about engagement+Faking relationship with Guyman= It's just like those fun romantic comedies!

I need to learn how to add. It went about as well as one who was not what I would call "Under the Influence of Guyman" or "UIG" would expect. We had planned to make it last two days, but after a particularly nasty fight with his ex-girlfriend, I made him agree to help me call it off, leaving behind us a wake of awkwardness and apology.

It's funny the things one thinks that people will remember, however. While talking about April Fools Day pranks the other day with some friends, who had all been a part of this prank, I said that I had pulled mine back in February. The response?

You got engaged? I wish I'd been in on that.